Some of these are really good. Have you read the Asimov story about how jokes come about? They ask Multivac all sorts of questions hoping to get the answer and when they do get it, they don't like it at all. The name of the story is 'The Jokester' and it's worth a read. Asimov loves Multivac, doesn't he?
A little pig goes into a bar and orders ten drinks. He finishes them and the bartender says, "Don't you want to know where the toilet is?" The pig says, "No, thanks, I go wee-wee-wee all the way home."René Descartes is in a bar at closing time. The bartender asks him if he'd like another drink. Descartes says, "I think not," and he disappears.
A bear walks into a bar and says, "I'd like a beer and . . . . a packet of peanuts. The barman says, why the big pause?"
A kangaroo walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says, "That'll be $10. You know, we don't get many kangaroos coming in here." The kangaroo says, "At $10 a beer, it's not hard to understand."
A termite walks into a bar and asks, "Is the bar tender here?"
A cheeseburger walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve food in here."
A dog with his foot wrapped in a bloody bandage hobbles into a Western saloon. He sidles up to the bar and announces: "I'm lookin' fer the man that shot my paw."
A baby seal walks into a bar. "What can I get you?" asks the bartender. "Anything but a Canadian Club," replies the seal.
A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender says, "You're quite a celebrity around here. We've even got a drink named after you." The grasshopper says, "You've got a drink named Steve?"
A goldfish flops into a bar and looks at the bartender. The bartender asks, "What can I get you?" The goldfish says, "Water."